I Was Wrong About Love

Five ways we go wrong in relationships

I couldn’t wait to hop onto MSN Messenger to chat with my crush after school. My first run-in with love was like most of ours—full of happy hormones and spazzing brain chemicals.

It’s still a rush to wake up next to the person I love, but it’s so much more than I ever imagined it could be. Love goes beyond a feeling; it operates in ways my mind still struggles to understand. But there were seven crucial missteps I made when seeking love. They hindered me, stunted my relationships, and—had I not let go of what I thought I knew—would’ve made it impossible to welcome the boundless love I now feel daily.

The kind of confusion I carried about how to connect with others led me down a painful path of self-neglect, bruised boundaries, and an unrelenting desperation for something I believed I was doing everything to attain. Yet every time I found some semblance of love—romantic or otherwise—it slipped through my fingers. And I know I’m not alone in this.

Unlearning these patterns shifted the way I connected with others. It invited me to accept myself more deeply and appreciate greater dimensions of human connection.

Shifting even one of these misunderstandings could change how you experience love forever.